Non-Killing

A student recently asked about the precept of "non-killing," the first of Buddhism's 10 Grave Precepts. The question came about because of a relationship the student didn't approve of. In fact he wanted to "kill the relationship."

From the non-dual or absolute perspective, the precept of non-killing is violated when we come from the perspective of duality or separation, rather than being one with what is. Trying to kill the relationship is trying to control others, again separating ourselves from what is, and what we can’t control. This aversion to the relationship arises out of greed, anger, ignorance, pride and jealousy - the Five Poisons in Buddhism.

We may begin to see aspects of ourselves we don’t like when we sit in meditation. If we try to ignore or are averse to what we discover, that is seen as killing the wisdom of Buddha instead of welcoming it. Every aspect of ourselves wants to be awakened, every aspect is already buddha, and for some just not yet awakened.

“To welcome fear, anger, greed, hatred, and all possible [what we often characterize as] negative emotions [such as pride and jealousy], sensations, and thoughts gasping for breath in us, and to do so with curiosity and compassion, is to be surprised by freedom, [spaciousness], love, transformation and life!”*

So back to the question, when we want to “kill" a relationship we don’t approve of or even hate, that is breaking the precept of non-killing. Making it about self and other, there is separation rather than oneness. To really kill the relationship is to become one with just what is, to realize the delusion of separation, that is maintaining the precept of non-killing. 

don't worry, spiders

I keep house

casually

Kobayashi Issa

(1763-1828)